Wyatt....His going away party...maybe more pictures to come.....

March 5, 2007-pictures

March 5, 2007-Monday

I have so many thoughts right now that I just need to express so bear with me as I try to get them out in some sort of organized manner. This blog is for all who are reading it. I am realizing that as my days pass in Japan, more and more people are reading this blog, and so this is my opportunity to use my gift of writing to give you insight into me, and more importantly to share with you why I believe some of the things I believe. I understand that when you read this blog, it's like me talking to you, so hear my voice as I share........


The other night at my co-workers party, I drank too much. The party started at a standing bar and winded up at a Karaoke spot.....the only thing that I regret about that night was drinking too much....I wasn't falling over drunk or anything like that, but I still had one too many for me. During the evening, I heard in my spirit, "Do not be drunk with wine, but be filled with the Holy Ghost." That's a quote from the Bible. It comes from the book of Ephesians, the 5th chapter, the 18th verse or (Ephesians 5:18). It means that if you're going to be drunk, then don't let it be from liquor, but from the Holy Ghost, or the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is the 3rd part of the "Godhead" or what you may know as the "Trinity." This trinity consists of the Father, the Son (Jesus) and the Holy Spirit. The Bible says that when you accept Jesus as Lord and Savior, then the Holy Spirit starts to live in you. I have personally experienced some times of when I had no alcohol in me, but I felt extremely intoxicated. It's called being drunk in the Holy Spirit. Anyway, while at the party, someone came up to me and said not mockingly, but very innocently, "I thought you were religious, but you are drinking." I told him, I was not being a good example tonight, and to please forgive me. Furthermore, I don't want to be religious. I'll explain what I mean in a few.

Let me clarify......the Bible doesn't say drinking is wrong. The Bible says if you do it, do it in moderation....don't be drunk though....to some that read that, they may think, Oh, it's just a book full of do's and don'ts, but that's not the case...it's soooo much more than that.

I understand that since I've been here, I've been losing a lot of my religiosity, and that's a good thing, however, I know I don't need to sin to lose it. There's a difference between being religious and being in a relationship with Jesus Christ. The people who wanted Jesus crucified were religious, but his followers weren't, neither was He. He wasn't trying to be something, He just was....I was watching www.streamingfaith.com earlier. Bishop Eddie Long was on there, and I want to paraphrase what he said. He said, 'Truth is what God says, Religion is what man says that God says.' I get goose bumps just writing that.

Religion puts people in a box of confining rules, whereas Christianity or true Christianity is a way of life....I feel like my friend in the Bahamas. Anytime people ask her what her religion is she says she's a believer....not a Christian....she is, but it's just that Christianity has gotten such a bad reputation because it's been perverted by religious people. That's why some people are sooo turned off by it. Shoooooo, I even understand....I'm turned off by , "church folk," but I love God's people....I love all people. When you are a Christian, you are in a relationship with Jesus Christ.....so, it's like this.....if you are in a relationship with someone, you want to spend time with that person, you don't want to hurt that person, you want to have fun with that person....it's the same. I know the things that hurt the Holy Spirit's feelings, and I don't practice doing them . Do I hurt the Holy Spirit's feelings sometimes? Yes, and am I sorrowful, yes....Those are things that I don't want to do again. It's called sin. But is it a deal breaker? Am I not in a relationship now because I've sinned? Of course not. The Bible says in 1John 3:10, "In this the children of God and the children of the devil are manifest: Whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is he who does not love his brother." Do I practice walking in the light, yes. Do I sometimes allow the darkness to come in, unfortunately yes, but do I make a habit of it, no.....don't get it twisted. Speaking of light....

I'm at the Karaoke place and there was this one guy there who mentioned to my co-worker that he likes me...he said how he loves just being near me, and my co-worker called it the Karon factor. Now, I laughed, one because the guy who said it is a player, but two, because I beg to differ. If realized that in the things he was saying, he wasn't attracted to me persay, but to the light that's on the inside of me. His attraction is to the Jesus in me, not me. So, it's crazy how my light can shine, even in darkness...."Where sin abounds, grace abounds much more..." (Romans 5:20).

I don't have a heaven or a hell to put anyone in, so I do not judge, because if I point my finger toward you, there are at least three fingers pointing back at me. I love Jesus because He first loved me. He has changed my life. Is everything wonderful...of course not, but it's better. I sleep in peace, (except for talking in my sleep...smile) I have assurance that no matter what I go through, it will all work out for my good in the long run and that gives me rest....so on that note, I'm done and I'll get those pictures up soon.....

selah

.....until next blog,

K

-March 4, 2007-Sunday-

This is the day after my co-worker's going away party. I don't even know how I have the energy to write now, I'm soooo tired. The party was Saturday after work, but I didn't get back until around 6:05am this morning and I had to be at work at 10am....Since it takes me an hour to travel to work, I got roughly 2 hours of sleep....a little under......I'll never say never, however, I'm doing that anytime soon.....it was a great party though....Wyatt's my co-worker, and he'll be missed a great deal.

Well, two nights ago, I had a dream that freaked me out. I was in my house in Jersey, but it wasn't the way my house really looks....anyway, I'm asleep in my house and all of a sudden it starts raining on my head, so I wake up, but I don't remember seeing a hole in my ceiling....anyway, I get out of bed and realize that I'm on an angle.....and for some reason, I thought to myself in the dream, "Oh my goodness, I'm on a landslide, and the house is on a cliff!" So, I walk over to my brother's room to get him up....in my mind I thought, I have to get my family out of this house no matter what.....so I yell at him to get up and be careful because one wrong move and the house will fall over....so he gets up and then we go over to my parent's room to get them up and I tell them the same thing, and the dream ended with the house about to fall, but all of us were at the threshold getting ready to jump...and in the dream, I yelled, "We have to get out of this house!" and I woke up and heard myself audibly saying that......For family members, remember when I used to talk in my sleep? It's happening again. For anyone who would know how to give me a Godly interpretation, please do...I'm open. I shared this with my Pastor and she told me to pray for the interpretation like Daniel prayed in the Bible....I will continue to wrestle with this one....Well, I need to go to sleep so...I'll share some pictures from the party soon...I have to check with folks first to see which ones they wouldn't mind to be posted....nothing incriminating (smile) I just want to check first....

......until next blog

K